Socialism: A Crash Course

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“The American people will never knowingly adopt socialism, but under the name of liberalism they will adopt every fragment of the socialist program until one day America will be a socialist nation without ever knowing how it happened.” – Norman Thomas, American socialist

There is not a lot of clarity these days, here in America. People seem to have lost their heads somewhere in the darkest regions of their own colons- or someone else’s. Like ostriches, stubbornly refusing to pull their heads out of the sand, the American populous is scared, stubborn and has no clue what to do in the face of all of these crises that have transpired in such a short span of time. The base, simple, and presumable answer to all of these problems is to, first and foremost: Blame the government. After all…everything is the government’s fault. This, epecially when that government is based on the idea that the people are supposed to keep it in check. The second “deer in the headlights” answer- is CHANGE! and fucklots of it! Since it was clearly a “Republican” who got us into the mess we are in, we ought to elect a Socialist in Democrat pinnings! Let’s completely deviate away from what is balanced and sensible- and go careening towards the other extreme. Yeah, that’ll show those dumb conservatives!

The problem with this simple line of thinking is that it is emotional and subjective. Johnny stole my cookie, so I am going to bite Johnny. Simply observing the behaviours of small children can give you a general idea of how primitive and reactionary this type of thought process is. If we adhere to this line of thought, we could assume from: A) George Bush was a shitty president. B) George Bush was a so-called “Republican.

that: C) Republicans are inherently bad, and if we elect another one, he will be just like George Bush.

A+B=C

That’s a brilliant deduction… if you are a third grader.

Letting emotions control our basic common sense is what will be the death of this nation- and perhaps was one thing that our founding fathers may have overlooked in regards to the human condition, while they were writing all of the crazy shit down that we now refer to as: The US Constitution.

For the very same reason that our government is in shambles, the allure of socialism is able to take hold. We are emotional beings. “If we don’t socialize medicine or give people handouts, then the Republican party is going to slay puppies, and people won’t have free prescription drugs. They’ll have to…*gulp* get a job and pay for them!!!!!” And, we all know that the government making us pay for stuff is inherently mean…So, because yer man Socialist Bob promised to buy everyone in America the same sparkly blue dildo, so they could all get off equally- he gets the advantage…because people think they’re “getting something out of it”. The reality, though, is much more mordant than that. Because, what Socialist Bob is actually doing- is telling all of these freeloaders to go fuck themselves.

So…for anyone who has ever empathized with Marx, or thought socialism could work (btw…neither it, nor communism does- I’ve been to Cuba…seen it in action), this rather piquant bitch is going to give ya’ll a crash course.

Obamahood, Obamahood, the Socialist Whore

He Steals from the Rich to Give to The Poor

The first thing that needs to be known about socialism is that it’s goal is equality, or rather egalitarianism. Another political -ism…which, like most, seems to suggest some sort of idealism (ha…there’s another one!) You see also- communism, anarchism… But, you don’t see -ism in Democracy. Not really relevant or a useful point. I just felt the need to point that out.

Egalitarianism is a nice word for a nice suggestion that, like most other -ism’s,  will sadly never work. If you want Egalitarianism- you will have to go to Disney World to get it. Out in the real world- nobody is equal. That fact seems to outrage some people as they get older and stop pooping their pants- and believing in socialism becomes a way to “make it go away”. So…socialists are kind of at Disney World alll the time.

The most basic idea in Socialism, is that people should be equal, and the government should be instrumental in making it that way. Or, for those of you who like it laid down more blatantly: a bunch of oligarchs and other nasties think that people are generally too stupid to govern themselves. And, while the United States is a perfect example of that, right now- it is only because of the ever-growing socialist factions and laws in our nation. The beauty of socialism for lazy types is that you don’t HAVE to think for yourself. The government does it ALLLL for you. And, while this is something that people ought to be afraid of, they aren’t. Most Americans must have been balling up spit wads, sleeping, or picking their noses when their History teacher made mention of the fact that America was created based on the principle that large governments are dangerous instruments of oppression. Yeah…

Socialists are a broad-ranging, rowdy bunch of partiers.

These Men Really Knew How To Shake Dat Ass!!

Their beliefs have a range, and go from wanting to effect complete government control over things ranging from things we already subsidize, like electricity and farming, to things traditionally held as private industries a la banking, military contracting, etc., to state control of capital- within the bounds of a pseudo-capitalist market economy…which…after the bailout is essentially what we’re playing at, here in America Inc.,

This socialist business, as a theory is a relatively new idea. You can see examples of it being tested in current day China, Cuba, and Venezuela. You may say…now Jessica, China is (technically) a communist nation. And, to that I would say- you are ABSOLUTELY RIGHT! But, you see…socialism is a go-between. Ol’ Marx told in his manifesto that Socialism was the transitional phase between Capitalism and Communism. This is precisely what’s happening in Venezuela. Venezuelan socialism holds an extra special place in my heart, as my husband is from Venezuela- and his family has to put up with the non-sensical ravings, irrational and corrupt behaviors, and ever-growing oppression that now exists in their once relatively democratic nation (lets say…democratic for South America…). Chavez is a raving lunatic- put up in office by the same dangling carrot that now attracts half of all voting Americans.

Many people are very hungry for this carrot. But, it is an inherently un-American carrot…the kind whose roots do not deserve to stretch themselves through the soil of America. For, surely, we will end up exactly how our founding fathers told us not to: giving into the whims of dependency and laziness. Socialism did not exist when the constitution was written-but, it is so blitheringly obvious that Socialism and Class Rule (which, is unfortunately what Socialism eventually becomes) were the exact things that they wrote the constitution and fought bloody battles to protect us against.

Can we please consider for a moment that Obama is NOT going to effect a positive change in our nation? That, whilst he is the antithesis of George Bush, they are also one in the same- both destructive, un-American forces concerned with their own rule?

I guess it all boils down to a question of desires.

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